two lotus

Balancing being selfish and selfless as a Big Visionary.

In a world saturated with motivational Instagram quotes, it might seem like an extreme life philosophy is best:

“Don’t be afraid to put yourself first!”

“Give until it hurts!”

“Make yourself a priority!”

“The secret of life is giving!”

But an article published eight years ago about the top five regrets of the dying suggests differently. The regrets were:

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

2. I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.

3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

If this list is accurate, to live a life without these regrets, you need to be both selfish and selfless. Where do you fit on the continuum? Is the time you set aside to work on your Big Vision swallowed up by others’ needs? Or are your relationships suffering because you always put your work first?

If you feel like you’re leaning too much one way, or the other, what would help you live more in the middle?

Sometimes it’s a simple issue that is resolved by moving things around on your calendar.

And other times it’s about facing fear.

Fears of:

• Not being liked if you put your needs first.

• Missing out on an opportunity if you’re not working all the time.

• Failing if you put time into your Big Vision and it doesn’t work.

• Being vulnerable and getting hurt in relationships.

Being a satisfied Big Visionary means balancing selfishness and selflessness. This week, give yourself the gift of quality time to work on your Big Vision and to be with the people you care about.

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Photo by Nikolay Vasiliev on Unsplash

One thought on “Balancing being selfish and selfless as a Big Visionary.

  1. Tom Aageson says:

    The list seems to be close to accurate. There is a new book out, “Initiative” that does address these issues. Good post.

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